My fingers are crossed for a beautiful outcome…
Do let me know how our egg donor did…how many eggs were retrieved, how many fertilised and the grades for our embryos etc.
This would be my first informed IVF cycle, since I engaged with the fertility clinic in 2011.
I think a donor IVF cycle is better than a standard IVF cycle, in that there is someone responsible for taking care of your cycle, you are like their patient and kind hearted Gerida always makes her recipients forget the emotional side of their cycle with her humour and jokes! Keep it up girl. …we shall keep sending ladies like me to you!
I cannot stop thinking of how difficult it was for me to decide on going the egg donor route. Your positive energy has kept me going and I am taking it a lot easier that I expected. You don’t know how much you have counselled me with your kind words.
Gerida, I appreciate you a great deal. Keep it up. Botswana will keep you very BUSY!”
“This morning I woke up to an email that told me the donor I had painstakingly chosen was no longer viable. After a long and emotional search I felt once again defeated and inadequate, you see it’s not just about choosing another woman to be the beginning of your future child’s life, it’s about realising once again that you can’t do it yourself. BUT then tonight the wonderful Kim at Nurture brought me you and I was once again reminded again why everything happens for a reason.
I just turned 42, I am the Director of four businesses and I passionately believe in ideas and creation and doing what you love. I am a talent agent (like Jerry Maguire but it’s not that glamorous in real life, no one ever completes you!), my job is to make other people’s dreams a reality. Somewhere along the line my dreams were ignored. It wasn’t a conscious choice, I didn’t mean to be here at 42 without a husband/partner or a family, I didn’t deliberately put career over children and I certainly didn’t choose to be diagnosed with early menopause at 41 making it impossible for me to have my own biological children. Stupidly I thought I had more time.
Reading your profile tonight made me smile and laugh, you sound a lot like the very wilful, ambitious and determined 20’s something I used to be and still am (just with more wrinkles)! I wasn’t as clear as you are with my goals at that age, I just loved the ideas, I loved creating something and seeing it to fruition, I loved working hard and seeing the results.
When looking for a female donor you want that person to be as much like you as possible, a Caucasian with blue eyes was important because that best physically represented me, but intelligence was equally important. Not necessarily academic intelligence, I was more interested in ingenuity, wit and passion, if I have to choose another woman to create my child then she had to be like me. By the way you write I can tell you are smart, I can tell you are quick witted, that you are curious and that you not just learn, but you absorb the information around you. That’s the kinda gal I am after! I love that you are an actress, it’s a craft I gave up too young and my Mum and I actually fist pumped and did the gig when we read that you have a knack for writing as it is something I am very passionate about and have been told I am very good at.
Suffice to say I am very grateful you came along, you seem like the perfect fit. Although, there is one more thing I would like to ask of you (as if you aren’t doing enough), I am hoping you will reconsider the ‘no’ answer to the question about being contactable if the laws in SA change. In Australia the laws are that a donor must be willing to go onto a registry for the child only to make contact if they wish after they turn 18, the donor still has the option at that point to say no they do not wish to be in contact, there is a chance SA may eventually end up making the same ruling. I am asking you this not because I expect my child would need to come looking for a mother figure, I’m asking because I feel I should on behalf of my unborn child. I don’t think this is my decision to make, I think if the option was there then it would be my child’s and yours to make and if down the track you decided you didn’t want to then you would have the option to say no then as well.
I have no idea if the decisions I am making today are right or wrong, I guess like any hopeful parent I will just do my very best. So if for whatever reason he or she would like to learn more about their genetic heritage then I feel like they should at least have the potential to do that and as their future Mum then I need to try to give them that option. I understand if your answer is still no, and it won’t change my decision to request you as my donor, I just needed to ask.
“I am thrilled to share that I will be 14-weeks pregnant on Friday and all my test results are great, we are having a baby girl! My OB thinks all looks great. The next step is the 20-week scan for all body parts etc.
It has been quite a long two months, but oh my, this is all we had hoped for and if we had the option to pick the sex, it would definitely be a girl!
I am really just letting all the good news sink in. I am feeling extremely hopeful and also amazed at how this is all unfolding at this time.
With much gratitude to you and your team for all you do. Thank you for your patience and persistence getting me to this result. I feel beyond confident with not just our egg donor, but in fact the entire story about how this all unfolded / ended up. That this came together with you and Nurture in the end is also a very big blessing. The whole story sits very well with me and I am very grateful. I do want other women to know all the very good you all do!
Look forward to keeping you posted.
Kindest Regards and Infinite Gratitude
A beautiful egg donor’s message to a potential recipient:
“I would like you to take a moment to think about the opportunity you would have from receiving eggs from a donor. Those reasons are why I would like you to have mine. I would like you to have the opportunity to have unconditional love in your life, to be able to wake up knowing that you’ve created a life that is completely dependent on you is the most euphoric feeling I have ever had the privilege to encounter. Parenthood requires love not DNA”
“This was a very pleasant experience for me. The entire process was awesome and I’m so surprised that more people don’t donate. I saw the entire procedure as donating some extra tools from my shed for someone else to grow a little garden. Its a very cool feeling to be able to help someone by doing almost nothing, so much that I actually felt a bit guilty for receiving ‘compensation’ for the donation as this was no effort at all. It takes a village to raise a child, I would definitely do this again.”
“I don’t know your story, or what hardships you had to go through to get where you are now, all I wish for you is happiness and a chance to be so much more than you ever thought possible. You have love in abundance inside you, ready to be shared and I truly and dearly hope I can play a small part in making this dream a reality for you. Help realising your dream will be my honour.
I realise that standing on the other side of this letter, you are concerned about who I truly am when no one is watching. I can say with a clear conscious and an open, loving heart that I have nothing to hide. I love giving of myself and I love even more the fact that I might be part of something bigger than myself.”